The Lost ´´666 Things to Do to Ensure You Go To Hell´´ List.
{{NSFW}}
I used to work for a company that made an app that makes lists digitally. That was, until June 6th, 2006, at 6:06:06 AM. That exact date is when the company officially lost the dollar that prevented it from being bankrupt. I was deeply saddened as it was a decent job with decent pay, which was a whole $666 per 6 da Enough about my salary, though.
I heard from one review of the app that a user had killed themselves right after using the app for 6 months, 6 days, and 6 hours. Data on the user's phone revealed a list, called ''666 Things to Do to Ensure You Go To Hell, ''which listed 666 things that would land you a swift and permanent. The user's phone was lost after this user burned the device used to write the list.
It wasn't until now I hacked into the company's database, which is somehow still able to be accessed even though it's defunct and the site should be down, but somehow isn't. It is also said if you read the whole list, you will be haunted by an evil spirit for the rest of your life. Here is the list, next header. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The List.
# Work for Meth666 Inc.
# Eat cat shit
# Eat dog shit
# Eat any type of shit
# Write the number 666
# Worship Satan
# Write the word Satan on paper
# Write the word Satan on anything else.
# Repeat an item but with different wording on a list.
# Think the number 666 is lucky
# Be a cannibalistic asshole.
# Be named Dave
# Be named Ethan
# Be named Mia Laurence XI
# Have roman numerals in your name
# Visit Facebook often
# Use social media
# Create lists
# Be hypocritical to try to be funny
# Tell jokes
# Be non-serious at any moment in time
# Yeah, even when your friend releases a 50-gallon rotten-egga'.
# Have a dog named Chad
# Have a dog named Charley
# Not naming your dog anything other than Chas will have you hanged by the nipples.
# Eat a taco while standing on NO FEETS
# Like pineapple on pizza
# Support those who like pineapple on pizza
# Be born in the year 1990 - 2002.
# Put tomatoes in your neighbor's eyes while they are asleep. Looking (or not, now that you've blinded me) at you, Dave!!!!!!!!!!!
# Be from the state of Ohio
# Be from the state of Michigan
# Be born in Finland
# Fit any stereotypes that exist or will exist
# Be normal
# Listen to Daft Punk
# Blast the song "HAPPYJOYHAPPYHAPPYJOYHAPPYJOYHAPPY" at 3:33AM in the damn morning
# Be awake during 3:33AM or any time between 3:00AM - 3:59:59AM
# Be late for work even though it's literally one fucking step from your damn home
# Commit suicide
# Support suicide victims
# NOT support attempted suicide victims
# Listen to anything by Drake
# Listen to any music tied to religion
# Listen to songs about ponies
# Worship any higher figure
# Say that Patrick from the hit animated show SpongeBob SquareDance should go to Hell
# Say that SpongeBob should NOT go to HELL
# 7734
# Look for greatness where you know it isn't possible
# Laugh too much
# Live at the coordinates N 37 46 57.642", W 122 23 54.123".
# Eat insects
# Own the game GTA Vice City in any way, shape, or form.
# Play GTA San Andreas in a way that constitutes as having arsonistic intentions for the surrounding players or onlookers of your gameplay.
# IGNORE THE CONSTISTUION1!1
# GO AGAINST THE MOTHAFUGGIN USA
# Be un-patriotic
# Do not support the army of your nation
# Do not go against political figures that clearly deserve it
# Drive a 1969 Chevy model
# Be a ricer
# Modify your car to the point of ugliness (see #62)
# Destroy the N64
# Destory the SNES
# Destroy the NES
# Destroy the Gameboy Color & other variants
# be part of the furry fandom
# Send NSFW content to anyone named Sally
# Google pictures of the Earth's roundness because you're retarded enough to believe Earth isn't round
# Be part of the Flat Earth Society
# Encourage belief in the Flat Earth Theory
# Defend the Flat Earth Theory
# Make any video about the Flat Earth Theory that does not involve debunking it.
# Post pastas on the wrong site
# Be an internet troll
# Be of the Orc species
# Leave crums exactly a pixel in length, width, height, and mass.
# Violate the CC-BY-SA license
# Violate the Creative Commons Sharealike License
# Violate any CC license.
# Watch pronz in restraunt bathrooms.
# Moan so loud it wakes up the neighborhood
# Be part of the EVILNUSS PREVENTASS SQAD that kills innocents for no reason other than blood, gore, and tongue cutting.
# Travel on Route 69 in 1969.
# Time travel!
# Bend reality
# Gain telekanis
# Read the Communist Manifesto
# Read ''Harmonic Illusions in Science ''by Hemson L. Johnathan
# Use a pen-name.
# Hide your identity
# Lie
# Gamble
# Drink alcoholic beverages
# Go to casinos
# Pay the rent for someone else
# Borrow a used condom
# Be a trap
# Be attracted to traps
#Be attracted to children
#Have a small peepee hole
#Not fear F R E D D I E F R E A K E R.
#Have Yellow Color Blindness
#Have Blue Color Blindness
#Be colorblind in general
#Not tip the waiter at least 50% of the meal. You say you don't know how to get 50% of the bill? YOURAMOUNT - 50%. Simple. Calculatours exist, smh.
#Play "Wake Me Up When September Ends" at exactly 5:01PM, Saturday, August 30th, LEAP YEAR.
#Eat the number 7
#Orgasm with a Wii Remote
#Use the Wii Remote vibrations for the above activity.
#Endorse EA
#Endorse SEGA
#Retired from Nickelodeon in or before the year 2000.
#Deal pot
#Deal meth
#Deal crystal methane
#Deal any drugs that aren't legal
#Repeat yourself three times
#Repeat yourself three times
#Repeat yourself three times
#Repeat yourself four times
#repeat yourself four times
#repeat yourself four times
#repeat yourself four times
#Write depressing shit
#my dog died yesterday guys, please enjoy my list...
#Repeat 128 items on a list
#Work for Meth666 Inc.
# Eat cat shit
# Eat dog shit
# Eat any type of shit
# Write the number 666
# Worship Satan
# Write the word Satan on paper
# Write the word Satan on anything else.
# Repeat an item but with different wording on a list.
# Think the number 666 is lucky
# Be a cannibalistic asshole.
# Be named Dave
# Be named Ethan
# Be named Mia Laurence XI
# Have roman numerals in your name
# Visit Facebook often
# Use social media
# Create lists
# Be hypocritical to try to be funny
# Tell jokes
# Be non-serious at any moment in time
# Yeah, even when your friend releases a 50-gallon rotten-egga'.
# Have a dog named Chad
# Have a dog named Charley
# Not naming your dog anything other than Chas will have you hanged by the nipples.
# Eat a taco while standing on NO FEETS
# Like pineapple on pizza
# Support those who like pineapple on pizza
# Be born in the year 1990 - 2002.
# Put tomatoes in your neighbor's eyes while they are asleep. Looking (or not, now that you've blinded me) at you, Dave!!!!!!!!!!!
# Be from the state of Ohio
# Be from the state of Michigan
# Be born in Finland
# Fit any stereotypes that exist or will exist
# Be normal
# Listen to Daft Punk
# Blast the song "HAPPYJOYHAPPYHAPPYJOYHAPPYJOYHAPPY" at 3:33AM in the damn morning
# Be awake during 3:33AM or any time between 3:00AM - 3:59:59AM
# Be late for work even though it's literally one fucking step from your damn home
# Commit suicide
# Support suicide victims
# NOT support attempted suicide victims
# Listen to anything by Drake
# Listen to any music tied to religion
# Listen to songs about ponies
# Worship any higher figure
# Say that Patrick from the hit animated show SpongeBob SquareDance should go to Hell
# Say that SpongeBob should NOT go to HELL
# 7734
# Look for greatness where you know it isn't possible
# Laugh too much
# Live at the coordinates N 37 46 57.642", W 122 23 54.123".
# Eat insects
# Own the game GTA Vice City in any way, shape, or form.
# Play GTA San Andreas in a way that constitutes as having arsonistic intentions for the surrounding players or onlookers of your gameplay.
# IGNORE THE CONSTISTUION1!1
# GO AGAINST THE MOTHAFUGGIN USA
# Be un-patriotic
# Do not support the army of your nation
# Do not go against political figures that clearly deserve it
# Drive a 1969 Chevy model
# Be a ricer
# Modify your car to the point of ugliness (see #62)
# Destroy the N64
# Destory the SNES
# Destroy the NES
# Destroy the Gameboy Color & other variants
# be part of the furry fandom
# Send NSFW content to anyone named Sally
# Google pictures of the Earth's roundness because you're retarded enough to believe Earth isn't round
# Be part of the Flat Earth Society
# Encourage belief in the Flat Earth Theory
# Defend the Flat Earth Theory
# Make any video about the Flat Earth Theory that does not involve debunking it.
# Post pastas on the wrong site
# Be an internet troll
# Be of the Orc species
# Leave crums exactly a pixel in length, width, height, and mass.
# Violate the CC-BY-SA license
# Violate the Creative Commons Sharealike License
# Violate any CC license.
# Watch pronz in restraunt bathrooms.
# Moan so loud it wakes up the neighborhood
# Be part of the EVILNUSS PREVENTASS SQAD that kills innocents for no reason other than blood, gore, and tongue cutting.
# Travel on Route 69 in 1969.
# Time travel!
# Bend reality
# Gain telekanis
# Read the Communist Manifesto
# Read ''Harmonic Illusions in Science ''by Hemson L. Johnathan
# Use a pen-name.
# Hide your identity
# Lie
# Gamble
# Drink alcoholic beverages
# Go to casinos
# Pay the rent for someone else
# Borrow a used condom
# Be a trap
# Be attracted to traps
#Be attracted to children
#Have a small peepee hole
#Not fear F R E D D I E F R E A K E R.
#Have Yellow Color Blindness
#Have Blue Color Blindness
#Be colorblind in general
#Not tip the waiter at least 50% of the meal. You say you don't know how to get 50% of the bill? YOURAMOUNT - 50%. Simple. Calculatours exist, smh.
#Play "Wake Me Up When September Ends" at exactly 5:01PM, Saturday, August 30th, LEAP YEAR.
#Eat the number 7
#Orgasm with a Wii Remote
#Use the Wii Remote vibrations for the above activity.
#Endorse EA
#Endorse SEGA
#Retired from Nickelodeon in or before the year 2000.
#Deal pot
#Deal meth
#Deal crystal methane
#Deal any drugs that aren't legal
#Repeat yourself three times
#Repeat yourself three times
#Repeat yourself three times
#Repeat yourself four times
#repeat yourself four times
#repeat yourself four times
#repeat yourself four times
#Write depressing shit
#my dog died yesterday guys, please enjoy my list...
#Repeat 128 items on a list
#7
#shoot people's eyeballs out, kid
#Play as either of the following:
#Lucaro
#Hitler
#Ryan Cooper
#Falcon
#Nick Fury
#All other characters are heavenly and art not to be thought of as not so.
#
#Leave out an item on a list
#Use IIRC
#spin 3 times before singing "Ot's the best day ever" at the top of your lungs
271. skip a number on a list
272. screw up formatting
273. Leave too much whitespace
274. talk in reverse
275. eserever ni klat
276. listen to reversed music.
277. Use Zalgo text.